valentine's day Hello Mr. Jetplane's Mouth...Insert Foot

valentine's day

So I love my husband. He's a great guy. He's a funny guy. And if you know him in real life, you'd know he's a guy that doesn't always think before opening his mouth. I've tried to teach him about this, and he is getting better around other people, when its just him and me...thoughts enter his head and then come right out his big ol mouth.

So I'll set the scene for you...

Jetplanes both worked late last night and I needed to pick up my prescription the store nearby. So we decided to go eat some pizza. While eating our salads and Mr. enjoying a beer, I commented on how pissed I am that our base selection night got moved AGAIN...(yeah we're not finding out tomorrow, its been pushed to Monday). He asked why I am so upset about it.

Me: "I really feel like our lives have been on hold. We can't make any next steps in our lives until we find out where we're going."

Mr: "Yeah so if we find out we're going to Idaho we can work on getting you knocked up?"

(ever my eloquent husband, right?)

Me: "Yeah, maybe. But not until after my birthday...I want to get drunk!"

Mr: (rolling his eyes) "Whatever you say..."

So time passes and we get our pizza. Mr is also notorious for having conversations with himself inside his head and then saying something out loud like you should know what he is talking about....like you were participating with him in the 5 minute conversation he's been having with himself about the yard, or picking up the dogs' medicine, or even worse flight school stuff...

I digress, time has passed and out of no where I hear...

Mr: "I can't wait to build forts!"

Me: "What?"

Mr: "Yeah I can't wait to build forts, climb rocks, take him camping"

Me: "Huh?"

Mr: "Our future baby...I can't wait to build forts him and sleep in tents..."

Me: "Well I sure hope SHE likes to go camping!"

Mr: "HE"

Me: "SHE"

Mr: "Whatever as long as we don't have a "Hot" daughter, I'm fine!"

Me: "Excuse me...our daughter will be pretty."

Mr: "Yeah, well I don't want a 'very pretty' daughter, cute is good. I want a cute daughter."

Me: "What are you talking about?"

Mr: "Very Pretty Girls are whores and marry old men."

Me: "You are insane."

Mr: "No I'm serious, very pretty girls date old men and marry them for money."

Me: "Really, so I married you I guess that mean I'm not really pretty then."

Mr: "I'm talking about 10s here..."

Me: "Oh really...so I'm not a 10"

Mr: "UGHHHH...you know what I mean."

Yes, there is my foot in mouth husband....